Thursday, October 25, 2012
Saturday, October 20, 2012
There are so many things That I would like to say to you
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
good vs bad
Why does it seem that the ones who go early are always the good ones but the ones who deserve it the most are still around?
Friday, October 12, 2012
Las Vegas Lightning pictures
Las Vegas had a huge storm pass through this evening. The rain was the hardest I have ever heard. It was pounding so loud the sound was coming through the walls. The lightning was amazing! I love lightning! Its so beautiful. Here are some of the pictures I was able to pull out of the storm. I wish I was able to capture some more but I still think these are awesome
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
The What If Game
I hate this game. Though it seems like I always play it..
What if my mom didn't get cancer?
what if I didn't go into the military?
What if I went to college?
What if I won the lottery?
What if........
I then tell myself to shut the fuck up and move on.
What if my mom didn't get cancer?
what if I didn't go into the military?
What if I went to college?
What if I won the lottery?
What if........
I then tell myself to shut the fuck up and move on.
What a day- Went shooting
So I went looking for a place to shoot today, the recent rains had washed away alot of the road I was driving, I was all ready bought into it for I couldn't go back so I was going through very loose sand praying that I can make it accross to where the road picked back up. I think I lost about 5 years of my life in stress going on this road. I was almost certain I would get stuck. My feet sunk do
wn 6 inches every step. So I deflated the tires a little, sent a prayer and just went for it. Some how I made it down the 1 mile part of just loose sand / big rocks/ and washed out areas where I almost hit a couple times.
Needless to say after 3 hours trying to go through 2 miles of a dirt road I found a great shooting spot and blew up a watermelon, yogurt containers, and a cantalope.
Was an experience! oh yeah I stabbed my foot with a tooth pick and it broke off inside. It was a colored pick so now I have some color to my foot. I can't seem to cut it out.
Needless to say after 3 hours trying to go through 2 miles of a dirt road I found a great shooting spot and blew up a watermelon, yogurt containers, and a cantalope.
Was an experience! oh yeah I stabbed my foot with a tooth pick and it broke off inside. It was a colored pick so now I have some color to my foot. I can't seem to cut it out.
Friday, July 13, 2012
Really youtube?
Thursday, July 12, 2012
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Las Vegas to Arizona Sunrise GoPro Time Lapse
Monday, July 9, 2012
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Monday, July 2, 2012
Fast forward road trip video, Alaska to Oregon Time lapse
Friday, June 29, 2012
Alaska Road Trip Drive day #2 Bears, moose, and Goats
Alaska Road Trip Day 3: Sliding down the stairs
Tuesday, June 5, 2012
I'm Embarking on the trip of my lifetime
This trip starts tomorrow!
Flying Jetblue from Las Vegas to Anchorage to visit my brother Nate. After spending some time visiting some old military buddies I'll be roadtripping with my brother back to Oregon.
It will be a long long trip but the sights to be seen are going to be awesome. Hopefully we can stop at some pretty cool bars along and not hit a moose along the way. Speically if the moose we are talking about is the local barfly that we visit. Not me!
Flying Jetblue from Las Vegas to Anchorage to visit my brother Nate. After spending some time visiting some old military buddies I'll be roadtripping with my brother back to Oregon.
It will be a long long trip but the sights to be seen are going to be awesome. Hopefully we can stop at some pretty cool bars along and not hit a moose along the way. Speically if the moose we are talking about is the local barfly that we visit. Not me!
bushy and I know it
When I walk on by, girls be jumpin on the fly
I scare to the beat, walking down the street in my new leafs, (yeah)
This is how I roll, epic ghillie, suit outta control,
It's green and leafy the way to go
All my vines be whippin to and fro
I scare to the beat, walking down the street in my new leafs, (yeah)
This is how I roll, epic ghillie, suit outta control,
It's green and leafy the way to go
All my vines be whippin to and fro
Girl look at that bush (x3)
I, I jump out
Girl look at that bush (x3)
I, I jump out
I, I jump out
Girl look at that bush (x3)
I, I jump out
When I walk in the woods, this is what I see
Everybody stops and they staring at me
I got vines in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it
Everybody stops and they staring at me
I got vines in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it
I’m Bushy and I know it (x2)
When I'm on the trail, security just can't find
me, Fail
When cops get called, I'm in disguise trying to not get hauled (Off?)
This is how I roll, epic ghillie suit outta control,
We headed to You Tube, baby don't be nervous
We’re having fun and doin a public service
When cops get called, I'm in disguise trying to not get hauled (Off?)
This is how I roll, epic ghillie suit outta control,
We headed to You Tube, baby don't be nervous
We’re having fun and doin a public service
Girl look at that bush (x3)
I, I jump out
Girl look at that bush (x3)
I, I jump out
I, I jump out
Girl look at that bush (x3)
I, I jump out
When I walk in the woods, this is what I see
Everybody stops and they staring at me
I got vines in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it
Everybody stops and they staring at me
I got vines in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it
I’m Bushy and I know it (x2)
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle yeah (x4)
Do the wiggle yeah
I'M BUSHY AND I KNOW IT...
Do the wiggle yeah
I'M BUSHY AND I KNOW IT...
Girl look at that bush (x3)
I, I jump out
Girl look at that bush (x3)
I, I jump out
I, I jump out
Girl look at that bush (x3)
I, I jump out
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
I'm way to fat and old for this
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
My Hero Passed away
I have several heroes in my life including My dad, brother, and my grandfather.
My grandfather passed away Sunday night. He was going strong and it kinda took us by surprise. He was going to be turning 89 in June which most of the family was going to be in town. It would of been awesome. For some reason a couple days before Grandpa couldn't swallow and they took him to the hospital. They found some kind of Yeast in his throught. He was pretty week and dehydrated for he wasn't able to eat or drink. They said he'll be alright gave him some meds and he was going to stay at the Rosehaven nursing home for a couple days till he regained his strength. He went back in on Sunday to the hospital for he had low blood pressure. He did some tests and found out he had pneumonia. Said it could get worse real quick or he could pull through. He passed away an hour later with him grabbing my aunts hand as he took his last breath. I never thought he wouldn't pull through. He has battled everything and never shown a sign of weakness. He was strong. Stronger than I think anyone I could imagine could be. He was always the one to go to for unjudging advice. Always know he loved me no matter what.
The only thing I ever heard out of his mouth was I never skipped a meal. And after going through some old family pictures I have been waiting to see him again so I can tell him in person that there were plenty of years he never skipped a meal either.
It was a while since I talked to him. With his hearing gone it was hard to talk over the phone and it was hard for me to hear over the phone as well. When I heard he first went into the hospital I talked myself out of calling. I kept telling myself I will see him in 20 days. I'll just talk to him then. He knew I loved him, I know he loved me. Unconditional Love.
My Super hero is gone. I never thought of my life without him around. We miss you grandpa. Say hello to my mom, grandma, Luka and everyone else!
My grandfather passed away Sunday night. He was going strong and it kinda took us by surprise. He was going to be turning 89 in June which most of the family was going to be in town. It would of been awesome. For some reason a couple days before Grandpa couldn't swallow and they took him to the hospital. They found some kind of Yeast in his throught. He was pretty week and dehydrated for he wasn't able to eat or drink. They said he'll be alright gave him some meds and he was going to stay at the Rosehaven nursing home for a couple days till he regained his strength. He went back in on Sunday to the hospital for he had low blood pressure. He did some tests and found out he had pneumonia. Said it could get worse real quick or he could pull through. He passed away an hour later with him grabbing my aunts hand as he took his last breath. I never thought he wouldn't pull through. He has battled everything and never shown a sign of weakness. He was strong. Stronger than I think anyone I could imagine could be. He was always the one to go to for unjudging advice. Always know he loved me no matter what.
The only thing I ever heard out of his mouth was I never skipped a meal. And after going through some old family pictures I have been waiting to see him again so I can tell him in person that there were plenty of years he never skipped a meal either.
It was a while since I talked to him. With his hearing gone it was hard to talk over the phone and it was hard for me to hear over the phone as well. When I heard he first went into the hospital I talked myself out of calling. I kept telling myself I will see him in 20 days. I'll just talk to him then. He knew I loved him, I know he loved me. Unconditional Love.
My Super hero is gone. I never thought of my life without him around. We miss you grandpa. Say hello to my mom, grandma, Luka and everyone else!
Sunday, May 20, 2012
2012 Video Scavenger Hunt List
2012 Video Scavenger Hunt
Please include everyones link to their youtube in the description
Including ( your link will be added once you email me with your list to add)
www.youtube.com/ryanlewisvlog
www.youtube.com/shamelessvidz
www.youtube.com/forgiveninmate
www.youtube.com/OmarGoshTV
Be as creative as you can. This is meant to be fun. You don't have to do everyone.
Submited by Ryan
1. Video of the highest point you can
2. Best view you can find.
3. Video of someone dressed as Alan Garner off of the movie "Hangover" (Zach Galifianakis)
4. Video of you rubbing a bald guys head
5. Doing the Ellen Dance Dare (dancing behind them without them knowing)
6. Singing Hanson's Ommm bop song outloud in a crowded place.
7. Asking a stranger to marry you (female)
8. Asking a stranger to marry you (male)
9. someone famous
10. A doorman
11. A race on tricycles or little kid bikes
12. Someone doing the Macarana dance.
13. Someone dressed in Red White and Blue
14. Police sirens
15. Someone snoring
16. Lost tooth, or a loose tooth
17. Micheal Jackson dance
18. The weirdest name
19. A Christmas tree
20. A sunset and sunrise
21. dancing under a bridge
22. something creepy
23. A couple with matching clothes
24. Waldo
25. Asking someone at a store if they sell shnurples
26. A pencil or pen on someones ear
27. Video of you saying you love micky mouse in public
28. Someone picking their butt or nose
29. A couple arguing
30. Someone texting while drving
31. A homeless begger
32. Asking a stranger to hold your garbage
33. A crossdresser
34. Asking someone if they want your already chewed gum
35. A guy with a pink shirt
36. Video of you going through a drive thru with a happy meal box on your head
37 Someone doing the Caramelldansen Dance
38 Two guys kissing
39. you motor boating someone
40. someone motor boating you
41. you asking a stranger if you can smell their hair
42. you asking a stranger if you can have their socks
43. A road sign with an animal name in it (like bear Creek next right etc.)
44. A road sign with the president's name on it
45. A man with a skirt on
47. you telling a stranger happy birthday
48. someone wearing a cape in public
49. you going up to a stranger and acting if they are a friend you haven't seen in a long time
50. Ask 5 strangers what their favorite color is.
51. An Animal acting like a person
52. A girl Carrying a guy
53. A cat purring
54. A guy with painted nails and toenails
55. Someone dancing with a dog
56. Drink a full beer in under 5secs
57. Burp For 30secs
58. Stare at the camera without blinking for 30secs, 1 take. If you fail post it
59. Order a cab/taxi for homer simpson at No4 Springfield
60. Say how much you love ShamelessVidz Vlogs and why the whole world should subscribe
61. Say the alphabet backwards
62. Get 7 kisses off 7 people
63. Count to 10 in Welsh
64. Write your own youtube song and sing it
65. Do an impression of someone famous
66. Crack a joke
67. Do the silent Dance, no music
68. Make a Vlog the second you wake up
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Vote for my video- if I win I'll donate the money.
Hey guys I uploaded a new video for a contest for free vidcon tickets for my category.
if I win the grandprize is 7500! If I win any money I will donate it to a non profit helping kids with cancer.
If you could click this link and vote for me it will be awesome! You can vote up to 10 times a day
http://kingofweb.com/users/1371803558
if I win the grandprize is 7500! If I win any money I will donate it to a non profit helping kids with cancer.
If you could click this link and vote for me it will be awesome! You can vote up to 10 times a day
http://kingofweb.com/users/1371803558
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Nickelodeon called
A rep from Nickelodeon emailed me last week for the possibility of using my clips for a show they are producing. I didn't think much of it at the time, kinda just put it on the backburner for now.
So today the rep called me and talked a little bit. I think it would be awesome to see my video on TV, who would of thought?? right? Awesome!
I finished another video tonight, took me over 3 solid days to edit down. I'm really happy with the result. I'm going to be uploading it here soon so you all can take a look. The video is pretty minor league but I thought it was pretty good since I have just recently started using Adobe premiere to edit my videos
I also started up my Vegan Recipe website and posted a few new videos: Vegan Cauliflower Pizza Crust, Delicious Beet Juice Recipe, and Vegan Stuffed Peppers
In about 25 days I'll be flying up to Anchorage to visit my brother Nathan and family. We will then be driving all the way back to Oregon. It should be an interesting road trip! Going to be a blast.
So today the rep called me and talked a little bit. I think it would be awesome to see my video on TV, who would of thought?? right? Awesome!
I finished another video tonight, took me over 3 solid days to edit down. I'm really happy with the result. I'm going to be uploading it here soon so you all can take a look. The video is pretty minor league but I thought it was pretty good since I have just recently started using Adobe premiere to edit my videos
I also started up my Vegan Recipe website and posted a few new videos: Vegan Cauliflower Pizza Crust, Delicious Beet Juice Recipe, and Vegan Stuffed Peppers
In about 25 days I'll be flying up to Anchorage to visit my brother Nathan and family. We will then be driving all the way back to Oregon. It should be an interesting road trip! Going to be a blast.
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Friday, May 4, 2012
YouTube Video Scavenger Hunt
If you want to join in on this video Scavenger hunt please message me with your list (10-20 items to add to the scavenger hunt list) by May 20th 2012
Everyone creates a list of 20 challenges to be added to this list. Hopefully we can get around 100 different challenges you can do. You don't have to do them all.
My email is lou1847@gmail.com
Twitter= www.twitter.com/theryanaward
Please include the number of the item on each clip.
Video Should be finished and posted by June 30th.
You must put the Title as
2012 Video Scavenger Hunt
Please include everyones link to their youtube in the description
Including ( your link will be added once you email me with your list to add)
www.youtube.com/ryanlewisvlog
www.youtube.com/shamelessvidz
www.youtube.com/forgiveninmate
www.youtube.com/OmarGoshTV
Be as creative as you can. This is meant to be fun. You don't have to do everyone.
Submited by Ryan
1. Video of the highest point you can
2. Best view you can find.
3. Video of someone dressed as Alan Garner off of the movie "Hangover" (Zach Galifianakis)
4. Video of you rubbing a bald guys head
5. Doing the Ellen Dance Dare (dancing behind them without them knowing)
6. Singing Hanson's Ommm bop song outloud in a crowded place.
7. Asking a stranger to marry you (female)
8. Asking a stranger to marry you (male)
9. someone famous
10. A doorman
11. A race on tricycles or little kid bikes
12. Someone doing the Macarana dance.
13. Someone dressed in Red White and Blue
14. Police sirens
15. Someone snoring
16. Lost tooth, or a loose tooth
17. Micheal Jackson dance
18. The weirdest name
19. A Christmas tree
20. A sunset and sunrise
21. dancing under a bridge
22. something creepy
23. A couple with matching clothes
24. Waldo
Submitted by OmarGoshTV
25. Asking someone at a store if they sell shnurples
26. A pencil or pen on someones ear
27. Video of you saying you love micky mouse in public
28. Someone picking their butt or nose
29. A couple arguing
30. Someone texting while drving
31. A homeless begger
32. Asking a stranger to hold your garbage
33. A crossdresser
34. Asking someone if they want your already chewed gum
35. A guy with a pink shirt
36. Video of you going through a drive thru with a happy meal box on your head
List from Forgiven Iname (Jen and Erika)
37. Someone doing the Caramelldansen Dance
38.Two guys kissing
39.You motor boating someone
40.Someone motor boating you
41.You asking a stranger if you can smell their hair
42.You asking a stranger if you can have their socks
43.A road sign with an animal name in it (Like Bear Creek next right, etc.)
44.A road sign with a president’s name in it
45.A man with a skirt on
46.You giving a flower to a stranger
47.You telling a stranger happy birthday
48.Someone wearing a cape in public
49.You going up to a stranger and acting as if they are a friend you haven’t seen in a long time
50.Ask 5 strangers what their favorite color is
51.An animal acting like a person
52. A girl carrying a guy
53. A cat purring
54. A guy with painted nails & toenails
55. Someone dancing with a dog
Friday, April 20, 2012
Saturday, April 14, 2012
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Friday, April 6, 2012
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Saturday, March 24, 2012
This is what happens when you call the cops
 |
| This is what happens when you fall asleep when you call the cops on a CE Dorm party |
Friday, March 23, 2012
Who can get get a 10 wheel drive stuck? WE DID!!
 |
| 10 wheel drive stuck |
 |
| Dump druck stuck |
 |
| We had 13 inches within 2 days |
 |
| Also Crazy windstoms |
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Las Vegas bound
With my lease ending in June and a good friend trying to get me to move where she's at I gave the thought of moving.
Once a thought is placed in your head its really hard to get out. It started as what the hell to I'm going to do it. My friend Katie keeps trying to get me out to Detroit. I called corporate and looked into what stores needs an installer. As I found out Detroit doesn't have a Container Store so that was a no-go.
Katie tried to convince me to go with another job but I don't think I could leave TCS (The Container Store) I've been with them for 3 years and it feels good to know I'm an expert at what I do. I really do not want to go back to square one trying to learn a new trade. This is stable work and I enjoy it a lot! That and it pays well enough that it will keep me from looking at anything else.
So when I called corporate I looked in to the locations that need an installer. Washington DC (been there done that) L.A (been there done that) Boston (too far) and Las Vegas. I've always thought about moving to Vegas. Not for the City but for the weather and the people. I have a good friend, my old roommate from DC and a old good friend from LA. Both I have not seen in quite some time.
So I think I'm going to do it. I've looked online and it looks like the economy is turning around and it would be nice to get in while rent is so much cheaper. Its a new store opening May 12 so it will have to be a quick move. The only thing thats going to hold me back is if I can afford the move. For I do not know how busy I will be. You never know, maybe a casino wants all new closets?
The more I look at it the more it looks even better. I have enough to live on for 4-5 months with minimal work till the main sale starts.
So tomorrow I'm going to let corporate know that I'll take it.
Time to get packing
Once a thought is placed in your head its really hard to get out. It started as what the hell to I'm going to do it. My friend Katie keeps trying to get me out to Detroit. I called corporate and looked into what stores needs an installer. As I found out Detroit doesn't have a Container Store so that was a no-go.
Katie tried to convince me to go with another job but I don't think I could leave TCS (The Container Store) I've been with them for 3 years and it feels good to know I'm an expert at what I do. I really do not want to go back to square one trying to learn a new trade. This is stable work and I enjoy it a lot! That and it pays well enough that it will keep me from looking at anything else.
So when I called corporate I looked in to the locations that need an installer. Washington DC (been there done that) L.A (been there done that) Boston (too far) and Las Vegas. I've always thought about moving to Vegas. Not for the City but for the weather and the people. I have a good friend, my old roommate from DC and a old good friend from LA. Both I have not seen in quite some time.
So I think I'm going to do it. I've looked online and it looks like the economy is turning around and it would be nice to get in while rent is so much cheaper. Its a new store opening May 12 so it will have to be a quick move. The only thing thats going to hold me back is if I can afford the move. For I do not know how busy I will be. You never know, maybe a casino wants all new closets?
The more I look at it the more it looks even better. I have enough to live on for 4-5 months with minimal work till the main sale starts.
So tomorrow I'm going to let corporate know that I'll take it.
Time to get packing
Monday, February 27, 2012
Simple living
With Ray and Jen moving back up to Oregon here next month or the month after I'm set with deciding to stay where I live or move into something smaller.
I live in a 3 story, 3 bedroom town house with a garage. I always liked the simple life and it feels like this is over whelming at times for its so big. I enjoyed my 1 bedroom loft I had at the last place I lived which was big enough for me. I think it would be nice going back to just a one bedroom place and having only what I need and not so much extra crap that I never use.
The search has begun but I'm having a hard time trying to find something that I think would work. Rent prices keep going up down here and most of the places I've seen have only been a few hundred less than what I am in now. Then I think, why not just stay where I am. I could make one of the bedrooms my computer room or something.
I guess I have a little over a month to figure this all out before I have to start looking for sure. My lease ends in June 1st So I figured I had untill May before I have to decide fully.
Decisions decisions..
I live in a 3 story, 3 bedroom town house with a garage. I always liked the simple life and it feels like this is over whelming at times for its so big. I enjoyed my 1 bedroom loft I had at the last place I lived which was big enough for me. I think it would be nice going back to just a one bedroom place and having only what I need and not so much extra crap that I never use.
The search has begun but I'm having a hard time trying to find something that I think would work. Rent prices keep going up down here and most of the places I've seen have only been a few hundred less than what I am in now. Then I think, why not just stay where I am. I could make one of the bedrooms my computer room or something.
I guess I have a little over a month to figure this all out before I have to start looking for sure. My lease ends in June 1st So I figured I had untill May before I have to decide fully.
Decisions decisions..
Sunday, February 26, 2012
Friday, February 24, 2012
Bushman Scare Video
This is my Video of the Best Bushman Scare reactions I've got over the last month or so. I hope you like this awesome scare prank in our Ghillie Suit!
Thursday, February 2, 2012
the days just are Ugh
2/2/12
This week has had its ups and downs. Thought I was going to have enough to get my Harley and then my brake assembly broke in my truck. It cost me over 1000 to fix them let alone, two new tires and other needed repairs. So I've been weighing my options in selling it and buying another truck more dependable. I would have to scratch my Harley plans for that for a while which I really do not want to do. Though I am probably going to have to when I do my taxes for Uncle Sam is going to want some cash from me.
Things keep going deeper and deeper and I'm trying to stay away from where I was a couple years ago. I keep getting these deep down feeling that everythings going to turn to shit. I have this self destructive side that always like to poke through when things are going good. Things just start tumbling down before I can catch on whats happening.
I love my job and I believe I am up there to the top installers that they have. Though from a prior employer I have that permanent feeling i'm going to get canned everyday. For they were a complete piece of work and its effected me in every job. With where I'm working now its pretty distent and they usually only call when something is wrong. So I don't really get to talk to them much and when I do its quite short. I'm just glad I enjoy what I do and get paid well for it as well.
I like to be alone. People tend to drive me crazy cause I have a hard time relating in a personal matter. I can lay the fake stuff out for work to get the customers to love me but once I"m done I just rather be alone sometimes. Thank God I do get along with Ray and Jen great. But other than them my friend listing is basically zil. My best friend is up in Oregon and we talk maybe every month or so. Big groups gets me all twisted up. I get all awkward and just isn't enjoyable to me. I'll end up finding a barstool and grab a beer hiding from everyone else. I think its the constant chatter, loud sounds and the fact I have a hard time understanding what anyone says if theres more than 2 people talking or something else making noise. So when I do talk in that situation you are only going to see head bobs from me.
Lets pray this following week goes better than this week. Its Jen's birthday tomorrow so I'll put a happy face on for the day.
Can't believe its been over 11 years now since she left us. My life would be so much different. My families as well. The reason? who the fuck knows. I have yet to see anything positive out of it. What a fucking shame God.... Why don't you take the assholes in life, maybe murdering bastards. What this this all prove? a Trial? A trial for what?
This week has had its ups and downs. Thought I was going to have enough to get my Harley and then my brake assembly broke in my truck. It cost me over 1000 to fix them let alone, two new tires and other needed repairs. So I've been weighing my options in selling it and buying another truck more dependable. I would have to scratch my Harley plans for that for a while which I really do not want to do. Though I am probably going to have to when I do my taxes for Uncle Sam is going to want some cash from me.
Things keep going deeper and deeper and I'm trying to stay away from where I was a couple years ago. I keep getting these deep down feeling that everythings going to turn to shit. I have this self destructive side that always like to poke through when things are going good. Things just start tumbling down before I can catch on whats happening.
I love my job and I believe I am up there to the top installers that they have. Though from a prior employer I have that permanent feeling i'm going to get canned everyday. For they were a complete piece of work and its effected me in every job. With where I'm working now its pretty distent and they usually only call when something is wrong. So I don't really get to talk to them much and when I do its quite short. I'm just glad I enjoy what I do and get paid well for it as well.
I like to be alone. People tend to drive me crazy cause I have a hard time relating in a personal matter. I can lay the fake stuff out for work to get the customers to love me but once I"m done I just rather be alone sometimes. Thank God I do get along with Ray and Jen great. But other than them my friend listing is basically zil. My best friend is up in Oregon and we talk maybe every month or so. Big groups gets me all twisted up. I get all awkward and just isn't enjoyable to me. I'll end up finding a barstool and grab a beer hiding from everyone else. I think its the constant chatter, loud sounds and the fact I have a hard time understanding what anyone says if theres more than 2 people talking or something else making noise. So when I do talk in that situation you are only going to see head bobs from me.
Lets pray this following week goes better than this week. Its Jen's birthday tomorrow so I'll put a happy face on for the day.
Can't believe its been over 11 years now since she left us. My life would be so much different. My families as well. The reason? who the fuck knows. I have yet to see anything positive out of it. What a fucking shame God.... Why don't you take the assholes in life, maybe murdering bastards. What this this all prove? a Trial? A trial for what?
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